Ryan "T-Rex" Garwood

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Ryan "T-Rex" Garwood joined the Ship of Fools in March 2005. The nickname "T-Rex" was bestowed upon him by Benji "Hallway" Milanowski during a game of Apples to Apples before the April 2005 Relay for Life Show. The origin of the name comes from his tiny arms, unable to reach his cards into the middle pile. Along with T-Rex came engineering colleague John "Freshman/Tripod" Tubergen. The two were inducted into the Ship of Fools at the same time. T-Rex is known for his Hobbit-like features and mime and gibberish prowess.

First Show

Ryan's first show was the SCUM Show on April 02, 2005. It was at this show he began to bring 3 Things to unprecedented levels of fame.

Connections with Andy Ober and the Tower Players

Long ago, Ryan's sister (then the leader of the Miami [Oxford] Tower Players) met a man named Andy "Quasar" Ober at a Weird Al Yankovic concert. She immediately became friends with him and invited his parody group the Andy Ober Orchestra to perform at 'Provstock 05. Before being asked to join the Ship of Fools, Ryan arranged for the Fools to perform at 'Provstock where they would later meet the AOO. More storie

Outlandish Suggestions

Ryan was a spectator at the weekly meetings of the Ship of Fools for almost a full semester before attempting improv on stage. Seeing his sister perform improv before, however, had stressed to him the importance of having good suggestions for a scene. His suggestions came in the form of long uninterrupted streams of incredibly detailed scene suggestions, often blurted out moments after the emcee had asked for a relationship or conflict for the performers at the beginning of a game. Many times the suggestions took so long that he would continue to describe long after everybody else had shouted out theirs, and most turned in shock/amusement as his were completed.

Typically, most people suggest things like:

  • Proctologist and patient
  • Michael Jackson

(Actual) Ryan suggestions sound more like:

  • A crowded triage unit in a modern downtown hospital
  • Two paratroopers fighting over the last parachute in a B-52 being shot down over Normandy
  • Native medicine men re-creating a tribal rain dance to save the summer crops

Benji by Proxy

The Halloween Party of 2005 saw Ryan dressing as his best friend and Second Benji "Hallway" Milanowski. More than just a costume, however- this disguise was a full case study, down to the glasses and lack of polo undershirt, to a faux AIM profile full of color coded Fun Facts. He proceeded to host that evening's weekly meeting as Benji, presenting yogurt, removing his shirt, performing card tricks, and even attempting his patented glasses seduction move. At the traditional after-party, he proceeded to act like Benji and hit on, mostly, women all evening. As per regulation, he was required to have a number of females sit on his lap as the evening progressed. The final lady of the evening to spend some time with "Benji by Proxy" was a certain Jennifer Wilson. They were married in the Summer of 2011.

Officer Positions

  • Captain: Fall 2006 - Spring 2007
  • Webmaster: Fall 2006 - Spring 2007


  • Creator of the Annual Ship of Fools Awards in Spring 2006.
  • Organized the first Hanukkah Gift Exchange in Winter 2006.
  • Commissioned the Ship's first military rank, Sergeant.
  • Inducted into the Order of Charlie (2006).
  • Awarded the Last Action Hero (2007), (2008).
  • Shortest Captain to date.
  • Part of Foolish Lore

Improv Strengths and Weaknesses

Personal Life

Ryan is studying Aeronautical Engineering Technology at Purdue University. Frequently known to "rock out," especially to classic rock, and is re-growing his rock star hair. From Cincinnati, OH and comes from a short family history of improv comedians. He knows too little about blue herons, and too much about fish sex.

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