As part of its plan for world domination, the Ship of Fools mounted an expedition to the arctic to construct a secret underground lair. Two important factors failed to be taken into account: first, that the Ship of Fools’ ship cannot traverse ice; and second, that you can’t build an underground fortress when you’re on the ice above the Arctic Ocean. Things looked bleak as the expedition consumed its last ration of Funyons, until Scott appeared over the frozen horizon, riding a sled pulled by a team of elusive arctic penguins. He graciously delivered the Fools back to Lafayette, after quick stops in Memphis, London, Austin, Melbourne, Chicago, and Kuala Lumpur. To thank him for his generousity and marvelling at his ability to circumnavigate the globe in a single diurnal interval, the Fools welcomed Scott into their fold.
Scott “Klaus” Parker