Ashley “Invoker of Parlay” Kaufman

Stabber of Non-Fools
Fighting Style
It’s impolite to ask
Blood Type
Chocolate Milk
Biscuit Wrangling
Having learned the ancient art of “stabbing people from the darkness” at a very early age, Ashley was a ruthless killing machine capable of so much more killing than her weekly quota. She set off on her own at the age of 18. One afternoon, after a day of ambushing evil muskrats in their lairs, Ashley came upon a strange band of seagoing men. Noticing they had no wench on board their ship, she donned pirates’ clothing and joined the men. Upon boarding the ever-sailing ship, she discovered what a strange group they were, able to pronounce big words like “improvisationalist.” Ashley decided that she would learn their ways and they welcomed this new female-type addition to their jovial comraderie. She has become fiercely loyal to the ship and now handles the perforation of anyone who tries to stop the Ship of Fools.

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